Man jadda wa jada. Man shabara zafira. Man saara aladdarbi washala
Whoever truly struggle will triumph. Whoever have patience will find luck. Whoever walk on His way will find a way.
It has been a long and winding road. It has been a long writer’s block in a brand new journey. No worries. All praises be to Allah for all the good and the bad.
Some plans didn’t work as I planned. Some surprised me. Some left me in silence. Some burst me in laughters and tears. I have got nothing to say except, thanks to a soulful soul that has been through all that and every soul that has been always there with me, no matter what, through a kind prayer, silent dua, support, and kind words. They are all so meaningful. 2017 was a truly something and 2018 is another million dreams to reach.
My highlight would be to live is to love. And to love yourself is the foundation of living. I read on the headline news today about the habit of Twitter CEO in the morning after waking up. It was definitely not checking up twitter updates. Yet, it was giving your ownself a time. Meditating, reflecting, and listening to your soul. Loving yourself by eating good helathy food. Listening a motivating podcast. Talking to Allah. and so on.
This journey I am facing off is somewhat blurry and windy. Yet, I am so thankful to bear the fear of falling, doubt, and anxiety. As this month marked two years of graduating, it would be a remark on a new journey. Alhamdulillaah. I couldnt imagine how this adventure started. It was a coincidence if there ever be any in the world. I met Pak Isnaeni Achdiat on a conference. He was one of the main speaker, a lecturer and partner at EY. My voice trembled in front of the speakers. I couldnt believe. He was truly an inspiration. People thought we were relatives and some jokes about our names. No, not at all. Indeed, I have never imagined that I would be here under his team. At last, I can dream again that I could also give something within mylif through a role model who inspired me. I really do not know where this is all going to take me. Yet, I believe. Thank you team especially Bu Vonny for giving me this chance to learn and grow together with you, hopefully.
Every night I lie in bed the brightest colors fill my head. A million dreams are keepin me awake.. A million dreams for the world we’re gonna make.
Thank you. If there ever be a last word I could ever have to say. Dearest universe, thank you. Thank you for all the good, the bad, the best, and the worst that makes me who I am. Will you help me stand still? Will you show me the way and hold me along the way from now on 2018 till … ?
Have a dear 2018 to you, wherever you are.
A happy little life wanderer.
“The falling leaves, drift by the window. The autumn leaves of red and gold.”
Welcoming October. Sweet autumn, seems to be. Somewhere out there.
How is life going with you? I hope yours is well. It has been ages ever since the last time I wrote on this board. It has been full of surprises, good and bad, altogether. Alhamdulillah.
I am telling you a big big news that within these past months, I have turned into an auntie of a little baby namely Hanan Ali El Hurriyah. He was born on the independence day, that is why my sister and my bro-in-law gave him a last name of El Hurriyah. Besides, I got some surprises on marking my wishlist with a checklist one-by-one during these past months. There were some receiving and releasing of chances. There comes hello’s and “good”bye’s. And oh finally after all this time, I am happy that I am currently finishing an anthology of poetry and prose I wrote in this last decade since I was back in school. Bismillah, may it be a blessing. Hope to have an update on this here.
Dear October, thank you. If there ever be a last word I could ever have to say. Dearest universe, thank you. Thank you for all the good, the bad, the best, and the worst that makes me who I am. Will you help me stand still? Will you show me the way and hold me along the way?
Have a dear October to you, wherever you are.
Under the October’s sky,
A happy little life wanderer.
Dear a wandering soul,
I am missing the soul that wanders and seeks lessons. I am missing pouring down every detail of perspective, thoughts, feelings, and random phrases–for that I give the wandering soul a me-moment. Don’t you miss reading those or just enjoying the moment and every piece of thought?
Keep believing, my dear soul.
And now the end is near. And so I face a final curtain. My friend, I’ll say it clear. I’ll state my case of which I’m certain.
I’ve leaved a life that’s full. I’ve traveled each and every high way. And more, much more than this. I did it my way.
Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew. When I bit off more than I could chew. But, through it all, I ate it up and spit it out. I faced it all and I stood tall, and did it my way.
(My Way, by Frank Sinatra)
It’s been a long while since the last time I wrote a blog post. I surely miss doing this. But, to tell you the truth, I have been too exhausted just to post. It is like the moment you have too much and then, you just dont know what to say. Even so, I feel so grateful to finally get a time (such a runaway from my life routine) to set back and reflect. Things have gone unexpectedly well with so much ups and downs. The environment where I currently work becomes nicer though still a tough life. It is kind of an intersection of the academic and private life since PP partnership is such complicated world. It is good when the people have the same frequency and goals. Most of the time, conflicts of interest occur. Perhaps we get used to all the inconveniences, as time goes by. That way, we naturally have the ability to adapt though it depends on the person for how long each will be.
Some funny things, sweet gifts, and inspirations from those bapak-bapak have been such surprises lately. More importantly, I have been in the edge of a long way. Perhaps, it is time to leave. But, things themselves require me to stay. I remember that the saying goes, never stay in a calm water. Dive in the most dangerous, wide, wild, stormy, and ridiculous waves.
Last week, I finally had a chance to share with the kids and all volunteers across the archipelago about my life mission. It was totally healing and curing in this imbalanced working life to see the smiles and sincere hearts of the kids. It was such a deep relief to hear their laughter and the calling “Ibu Isna”. Indeed, I have been called with a name “ibuk” by the whole class and even my own teacher since I was in primary school, isn’t it sweet?
“Apa untungnya buat kalian melakukan ini?” Nggak capek ya? Bukannya udah sibuk?” “What is the benefit for you by doing this? Dont you feel tired? Arent you busy?” Ibu Kepsek bertanya, teman dan kolega bertanya, Bapak Ibu bertanya.
I feel good by doing this. I feel I have a value within myself. I love doing this, sharing and finding inspiration within. And I find happiness. I hope, others, too.
Now, it feels like I know what I want in life. Though it seems so far away from the world I am in at the time, I believe in my way. So, where are you going?
At Letters From Earth, Andrew Evans celebrates the wonders of farming and crafting clay pots — two occupations based on making something out of dirt with honest labor.
I found this beautiful writing. Read the full version story. Do yo know why I love this blog post? Because I miss Pottery–playing with clay and the wheels to turn something into an artsy artistic ceramics.
What kind of surprises could the year be?
I once asked my self. What do I really want in life? Until I finally reached a pointless point where I felt like I have been lost too much. Yet, I feel Allah is too generous to me. When I really didnt know where to go, he just opened a door. He showed me the way I never expected too risky sometimes and lonely to be honest. But, that way I could reflect more, learn things I have never thought I would, from the “most dirty” until then I dont know yet. I enjoy freelancing, and doing such things. But, there are moments that people you love expect you more. But, do you love yourself more? Or perhaps, there is always a gap between self perception and the glass-ceiling metaphor.
One day, Pak Andi told me about decision. Do things, prove what you can do to yourownself not to me nor to others. At some other times, he told me, “Sometimes we dont have to comprehend the whole things when they are beyond our capacity and dont take things personally, which are true to me.”
But, have you ever quit from doing things? Why would you give up? Could you help me?
Some other time, Pak Andi, again, told me. He once quit from his job because he chose to. He chose to reach what he believes is the best for him. But, I should not give up on myself and my own belief and my own dream, shouldnt I?
So, how would you decide which way is the best way? What makes you stay and what makes you leave? What makes you strive for and what makes you give up? Could you help me?
I only wish the year that has been passed already, was the best year I could make to my own self, to the Creator, and every beloved one. And I wish that the upcoming one would draw me closer to The Creator as a person to be the best I can be, to do the best I can give, and to find a way. Bismillah.
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